If You Say Stay
by PyroQueenOfFire
Summary: Lana and Dean were once the love story everyone wanted, until an event pulled them apart and left them bitter and lonely. Now, Lana is back in the fold to help with an extensive hunt involving everyone's past, and she and Dean have to get along long enough to keep Sam and Lily (Winchester26's OC) safe. Can they?; Dean/OC, Sam/OC
1. Business Relationship

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**I do NOT own Supernatural, nor do I own Lily Harte. Lily was created by Bree aka Winchester26 here on FanFiction and she has a bunch of Lily and Sam stories you can all go read because they're great. She and I have a YT channel together to vid our couples together called LittlebyLittleINC and you can find it be searching: 'Lana Dean Lily Sam' and then clicking the channel.**

**This is definitely an AU of "Hunting Demons" as far as Lana and Dean are concerned, and I've already got five chapters written, so expect one a day until I run out of chapters to do one a day. I just really love this idea and wanted to run with it.  
WARNINGS: Language, Blood, Sex, Violence, Dark Themes  
ENJOY!**

xxxx

"_I'm done, Dean…"_

The words echoed through his head more than he liked to admit and he knew he'd driven Lana Meckenzie there, but hearing the words come out of her mouth? She'd left without saying much more than that and when Sam mentioned needing her help, he was fairly certain he shouldn't be the one to make contact. He ran his hand down his face and then he took a deep breath and tried to focus as Lily Harte spoke up.

Sam and Lily met at Stanford. Sam was a Junior and Lily was a doe eyed Freshmen, both of them hitting it off right off the bat. They went through a lot of hardships, including Azazel killing her entire family, making her aware of this world and she'd become like the little sister Dean never wanted…and the girlfriend Sam didn't think he deserved. All Dean knew right now was there was a knot in his stomach that he wanted to get rid of.

"I think she needs to be here…she's the only person we know that's demonic that we can trust," Lily piped up before shrugging gently. "On top of that, I miss her."

It had been six months since their quad team had become a trio and Lily missed the extra estrogen, the motherly affection Lana gave her, the coffee chats about the boys…the chess games. Lana had been in the boys' lives since they were little, but circumstances pulled them apart and Florence and John kept them all apart because of what Florence was—what Lana was. She was Azazel's 'love child' with a witch that had an even bigger secret and when she and the Winchesters met up again, it was shortly before Lily joined them.

Or so Dean let them believe at first.

Lana and Dean had met up on a hunt the year before Dean went to get Sam from Stanford, and it was a whirlwind romance. They took to hunting and sleeping together and Dean fell fast…so did Lana. Unfortunately, Lana had always seen retiring and settling down in her future, and Dean didn't seem to outwardly show any interest in that at all. He was perfectly content travelling from town to town hunting things and Lana had had her final straw because three years and no commitment was too much for her.

"She's not going to want to help," Dean admitted shaking his head, having never told Sam and Lily the truth about why she left—they both assumed that Lana had abandoned him because the last hunt the four had been on was really close to home and Dean made a call Lana hadn't liked.

Sam took a deep breath. "Angry was she was with you, Dean, she'll help."

"If there's anything that Lana likes to do most, it's help out innocents," Lily agreed nodding. "Unless _you_ can't work with her…"

"I can work with her just fine," Dean told them rolling his eyes. "Fine, let's go get her."

Lily beamed and hopped right up to put on her jacket, Sam hanging back as she headed out to the car and Dean ran his hand through his hair. He didn't really know quite what to do here, but he knew that Dean was having a hard time with this and didn't really _want_ to see Lana again and he couldn't blame him. Everyone had been a little upset with Lana in the beginning for just bailing because Dean made a hunt call she wasn't behind, but then again…that wasn't very Lana at all.

"She left because you screwed up, didn't she?" Sam asked slowly. "Lily asked you that exact same thing and then you…you lied to us."

Dean looked at Sam. "Lily and Lana still talk, I'm sure, so she's known the whole time that I was lying."

"You let the best thing that ever happened to you just walk out the door and you never even looked back…" Sam told him slowly, shaking his head. "You know, that miscarriage was rough on all of us, so it was Hell on her."

"It was Hell on me too," Dean replied angrily. "Nothing was the same after that and she resented this job and so did I, but this is something that we have to do! The extra demons in the world, Lucifer rising…that was all on us! We couldn't just peace out!"

Sam sighed loudly. "Maybe not, but you could have told her how you felt."

"She knew," Dean said shaking his head.

"I don't think she did," came Lily's voice from the doorway. "Look, let's just get to Lana and then we'll deal with this later. She can't hold _that_ much of a grudge, can she?"

Dean chuckled and swung his duffle over his shoulder. "You know for as long as you hung out with her, you don't know Lana at all."

xx

Alana Meckenzie had thought that she was doing pretty well with her new life except that she was doing the same thing she had tried to run from: hunting. On top of that, Lana had felt like she was much bitterer since she and Dean had been apart…there was a hole inside of her that only Dean could fill and her heart broke every time she thought about him. She had always thought that he had loved her and appreciated her because he'd said it a time or two, but he'd just let her walk away.

Now he was back and she felt her stomach twist into knots and it was hard to breathe. She could sense him and she heard the Impala pull up and saw through the curtains she pulled across the window, Lily bounding out of the car and rushing toward the door. Lana and Lily had kept mostly in contact and while Lily was still upset that Lana had just thrown in the towel, she was glad that she could have Lana back.

"LILY!" Lana exclaimed as she tore the door open before the young brunette could knock on the beautiful wooden door, both of them embracing each other tightly.

Lily pulled back a little and smiled. "You look fantastic."

"So do you!" Lana exclaimed as she looked her over. "You have grown right on up since last we popped a ghost together."

"Lana," Sam said with a nod.

Even though she wasn't exactly happy with Sam either, Lana knew her reasons weren't really something she could be mad about, and so she hugged him before glancing at Dean and then refusing to acknowledge him past the look. She immediately looked at Lily and smiled and started to make small talk even though she had to admit at least to herself that her heart had beat faster just at the sight of him in that leather jacket with his hair combed and that button-up shirt…

"So what brings you all here? A hunt?" Lana asked, eying Dean venomously when she asked the second question. "As much as I'd like to—"

"—before you say 'no'," Lily jumped in, taking a deep breath, "it's an old hunt of your mothers and it involves things a bit above our pay grade."

Lana paused and looked Lily in the eye. "They're taking you on something dangerous like that?"

"Lana, I'm a big girl," Lily said with a smile, reaching out to hold her hand and give it a reassuring squeeze. "I can handle a little hunt. Besides, Sam has my back."

"That's always how it starts out," Lana told her bitterly and then forced a smile because she hadn't meant to say it like that even though it was bothering her.

Honestly, Lana had thought that Sam of all people would want to get Lily out of this so they could someday have a semblance of a real life, but he was a Winchester. Normally, she wouldn't think there was anything wrong with that, but hunting had cost her so much and she just felt like there was now nothing that she could do because this involved her and it involved saving people from darkness. How Sam and Dean could let Lily still risk her life though, was beyond Lana and her motherly instincts kicked in.

"I'll help," Lana said as she rose. "Just let me pack a duffle and I'll be right there."

Lily clapped her hands excitedly and then went into the kitchen when Lana told her to make herself at home, Sam chuckling and following after her. He knew that his girlfriend was after some coffee and he knew Lana had the good stuff, plus he wanted to let Dean have a moment to himself. Instead of keeping to himself, however, Dean went upstairs to talk to Lana even though his brain was screaming at him not to—his heart had something else in mind.

Seeing Lana again had him overwhelmed with feelings just as she had been when she had laid eyes on him after these last six months and she looked up when he came in the room. She was honestly not very happy to see him and sighed loudly, shaking her head at him and hoping her wouldn't speak to her but knowing he would. There was a lot of past between them and she knew he wanted to speak his piece, but the words that came out came out angry and that wasn't how Dean had intended them, but that was how they were delivered.

"You're honestly going to just ignore me?" Dean asked her.

Lana scoffed and nodded. "I'm going to try my hardest, though getting Lily out of this in one piece means we'll have to work together."

"So we'll just be civil until you run again?" Dean asked angrily, wishing he could just stop talking, but he kept going. "In all the times I pushed you away, I never actually took off."

"But you pushed me away!" Lana responded loudly, snapping at him. "You pushed me as far as you could because you were scared and I left! I deserve to have a chance at a family and a normal life!"

"You're not normal! Demons will always be after you! That's not a life!"

"You don't give a shit about that! You're afraid to be a father!"

Dean glared at her. "I wanted to be a father just as much as you wanted to be a mother."

"But you were pleased to be able to dodge the bullet nevertheless," Lana responded quietly.

The venom in her words was still there and it made Dean feel sick to his stomach because she was partially right: he had been terrified of parenthood. Still, he'd wanted the baby and he'd wanted her, but he was able to hide behind hunting and she was still hunting, he knew that now. She wasn't settling like she had wanted him to do with her and maybe he could make this up to her. Maybe she could find it in her heart to let him in again.

"Our relationship from here on out is a business relationship and nothing more," Lana told him even though it hurt her to say it—part of her just wanted to give in and melt in his arms, but she was stronger than that. "I'll help you, I'll use my powers if I need to and I will travel with you, but I'm doing it because Lily wants me to."

Dean nodded and ran his hand down his face. "Yeah, fine."

"Alright…you can leave our—_my_ room now," Lana responded even though she caught on to her slip up.

Nodding, Dean left…but he'd caught on to the slip-up too.

**Note: So there's the introduction/chapter 1! I hope that you guys will like this story as much as I do and let me start off by saying that Lana and Dean are both equally in the wrong here, so don't hate on one too much more than the other. There will be some cute flashbacks in the next chapter, as well as some cute Lily/Sam. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	2. Childish Behavior

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**Alright, here is chapter 2 and there are flashbacks as well as some UST because UST is a lot of fun to write. Also, this starts setting up the hunt.  
WARNINGS: ****Language, Blood, Sex, Violence, Dark Themes**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

Lana knew from experience dealing with the boys that there was a lot they weren't telling her—in fact the only person that seemed to keep her in the loop was Lily and Lana understood that. Sam was always going to be on 'Dean's side' regardless of his kinship with Lana and Lily was always going to want what was best for everyone no matter what that was. Still, things felt a bit awkward and Lana didn't know exactly what to do about it because she couldn't just wave her hands and make everything okay.

"Your music taste hasn't changed," Lana said with a sigh from the backseat of the car as she researched this hunt on her laptop.

Dean looked at her from the rearview mirror. "Your attitude hasn't changed."

"From what I recall, you liked your women feisty," Lana shot back without taking her eyes off of her laptop screen.

"Yeah, but you don't want to be like the women I like, now do you?" Dean teased with a grin.

_Lana paused and then continued. "I've always wanted to be like the women that you like…"_

"_What?" Dean asked after a moment or two._

_Teasing was Lana's and Dean's way of things, something that Dean had been getting used to because on top of that he had PDA moments. Sure, it started off slapping her ass as she went by just to show other men she was off the market, or holding her hand here and there—he'd even kissed her in public places before—but this was different. Dean Winchester was in love and he knew he was, but he was a hunter and he wasn't about to get Lana killed and then have to live without her. She could persuade him all she wanted, but his number one priority was to keep her safe, not to let himself get in too deep._

"_You can't honestly tell me that now just because Sam and Lily are here too that you don't know that deep down…this relationship of ours is more than just two business partners enjoying each other's company." Lana told him shaking her head. "You practically beat men off of me with a stick and I've never let you go home with any woman you hit on at the bar…not once we started sleeping together."_

_Dean ran his fingers through his hair. "You're exactly the kind of woman that I've always wanted, Lanni…I just won't be the reason you get killed."_

"_I appreciate that, Dean, but I'm a grown woman and I can make my own choices," Lana replied with a gentle sigh. "One of those choices, I'm afraid, is wanting to be with you."_

"_You only get to make your own choices if they're the right choices for you," Dean teased again, trying not to get too serious here when Sam and Lily could walk through the door any moment._

_Lana laughed and rolled her eyes. "You just love winning arguments, don't you?"_

There was really nothing that Dean liked more than winning an argument with Lana and before she had a chance to throw anything back at him, Sam had spoken up.

He cleared his throat first. "Turns out that the witch we're looking for is somehow connected to your mother but you know how she is…"

"Yeah, I do," Lana sighed loudly, glancing at Sam.

Much like John Winchester, Florence Meckenzie knew how to keep herself out of the picture when she wanted to remain hidden. There was so much about her that no one knew but one thing was sure: she was to be trusted. While she had had Lana, Azazel had possessed her in order to have Lana with her and Florence had been friends with Mary for as long as they all knew, in turn being Sam and Dean's Godmother and she helped John get into hunting in the first place. Now, she was off because her daughters were grown and Lana barely even heard from her anymore.

Lily only knew part of the story with Florence, but she had met the woman and she was fun and full of life just like Lana was. What scared her though, was that Florence and Lana had all this untapped power and she never knew if one of them was going to snap or not, regardless of how much she liked them. Honestly, when she'd found out about Lana's father—the same demon that slaughtered her whole family—she couldn't even look at Lana for weeks, but Lana was _not_ her father, and the way she carried herself and helped others spoke volumes all on their own.

"Any idea where we should start looking?" Dean asked Lana slowly.

Lana sighed and shook her head. "I'll see if I can't send her a few messages, but it might help to pick a place and stay there for a little while and seeing as how we're a bit far to just turn around…"

"That's a hint for me to turn around," Dean scoffed, shaking his head.

"It might be easier to lay low at Lana's," Sam suggested, shrugging when Dean shot him a look. "I'm just saying that until we have Florence, what else are we going to do? No offense, but I'm afraid that you and Lana might kill each other before we kill a ghost or a demon or anything—I don't feel safe hunting with you two and your animosity."

"I agree with Sam," Lily put in. "I would rather like to live for as long as possible."

Lana and Dean both made faces and noises of protest, but deep down they knew that Sam and Lily had a good point about it all. The two of them were due for another good fight soon and they'd been taking digs at each other since they'd met back up—even more so since getting into the Impala. As much as they wanted to claim that they were professionals, they were doing exactly what they had both sworn they would never do: they were putting their personal lives before their professional one.

"Dean and I can handle a hunt," Lana said shrugging. "We want to protect you two more than we want anything else."

Dean nodded, agreeing with her for the first time that day. "Agreed—in fact, let us prove it."

xx

"What if they killed each other?" Lily asked Sam as he pulled out of a kiss.

Sam stroked her hair and smiled. "As mad as they are at each other, I don't actually think they would kill each other…do you?"

"She's pretty hurt," Lily said as she made a face. "I know that Dean is too, but he pretty much told her to start being more realistic and I don't know, Sammy. I think the idea of having a future with him was what was keeping her together there for a while."

"Yeah, coming into her powers was really hard on her," Sam agreed with a sigh. "Dean just doesn't know when to let himself be happy. He's been sabotaging himself for as long as I can remember—Lana too."

Lily nodded and let Sam kiss her again, smiling into the kiss until the door opened and she and Sam were greeted with arguing. The two had come back from questioning the witness and while things had gone smoothly during the questioning, all they were doing was bickering. Sighing, Lily fixed her shirt and she and Sam turned to the two from the couch, Sam crossing his arms over his chest because it seemed he and Lily were the ones actually acting like the adults.

"I actually want to dare you to make me!" Lana shouted at Dean, eyes going to his mouth as she huffed angrily at him.

Dean caught the look and did the same, shaking his head. "We both know that's not a road you want to go down, Baby."

"Don't fucking, 'baby' me!" Lana shot at him, finger jabbing his chest. "Next time we do it my way or we don't do it at all!"

_Nothing quite turned Lana on like an angry Dean Winchester and as her eyes darted to his mouth and then his eyes, he was aware of it too. Angry or not, Lana intoxicated him and just like that he was kissing her passionately, letting her claw at his clothes and his arms. He let her make quick work of their clothes, the garments getting tossed this way and that, neither of them caring about anything other than each other in that moment._

_Her skin on his made him feel like he'd stuck his finger in a socket and he would know how that felt—this was amazing, however. She fit perfectly into him and the sounds she made were music to his ears, making him moan as he placed his hands all over her, the mattress moving as they did. Even if someone walked in on them, they couldn't stop if they wanted to…and they certainly didn't want to._

"_I'll still be mad when this is over," Dean pointed out, smiling when Lana laughed._

_She bit his bottom lip. "I bet I can make you forget all about it…"_

"Are you guys hearing this?" Dean asked Sam and Lily, Lana still looking Dean over before she turned to face them too.

"Are you guys actually doing this?" Lily asked slowly.

It was nice to be acknowledged, but Lily and Sam had a feeling that maybe bringing Lana back into this was too hard for them. They weren't arguing because they were childish—they were arguing because it was the only way to mask the pain that they felt being in the same vicinity and not really being together at all. Still, Lily's tone made them both feel childish; especially Dean, who was seven years older than her and should know better.

"We're looking for Lan's mother—the ball is in her court," Sam said shrugging.

Lana grinned smugly at Dean. "Here that? I'm the point guard."

"Oh go—"

"—suck a lemon? Sounds good to me."

"I'm old enough you don't have to try and make things PG for me," Lily responded, crossing her arms over her chest in a huff. "I thought this was going to be fun, the four of us back together, but you're both fun suckers."

Lana nodded because she felt bad but then she shrugged. "Hunting isn't supposed to be fun."

Lily made a face, but her heart was warmed a little bit when Lana offered to play a chess game with her, Dean miming strangling her. Sam chuckled a little bit and then asked Dean to take a walk outside with him, Dean reluctantly agreeing—it was that or stay in the motel room with Lana and Lily and the chess pieces. What bothered him the most was that angry or not, he was still turned on by not only Lana, but Lana's nerdy chess habits.

Sam smiled as he caught Dean's look in the direction of the door

"I'm wearing her down," Dean told his brother shrugging. "Give me a week and Lana and I will be just fine."

Sam nodded and put his hands in his pockets. "You really think it's that easy, Dean?"

"Why not? We've always patched up things before," Dean replied as he went for the vending machine, Sam in tow. "The only difference here is that I've let her stew for six months."

"The only difference is she's not yours to have…" Sam said slowly.

Dean stood up tall after fetching his bag from the machine, turning to look at his brother with pain in his eyes. Hearing that Lana wasn't his kind of made him feel like his knees were going to buckle underneath him and he didn't know what Sam meant by that, but he was going to get to the bottom of it.

"Six months is a long time and for someone who wants to settle down and have a baby…" Sam started to explain, shrugging his shoulders. "She wasn't going to wait for you, forever."

He didn't want to admit how much pain that admission caused him, but it was nothing compared to the sick feeling that Lana had in her stomach at the moment. She and Lily had somehow started talking about Dean's coping these six months—she was vaguely aware of having brought the subject up—and hearing about a girl he'd gotten really close to and even brought to meet Sam and Lily made her want to throw up. Lana wasn't disgusted that it happened, but she was definitely hurt.

"You should talk to him," Lily said gently, resting her hand on Lana's. "You clearly still have feelings for him."

Lana bit her quivering lip and shook her head, eyes glossy with tears. "No…he threw me away like last week's paper and I'm not crawling back on my hands and knees. I offered him everything and he made me feel like an idiot. All I wanted was an actual future with him: kids, a job, a home…an actual life. That's all I wanted. He didn't, and he made me feel like I should have known that that was what he wanted and I wasted 3 years of my life waiting on him."

"You don't really think they were a waste," Lily told her, squeezing her hand.

"This job isn't going to give you anything that you want, Lily," Lana said, slowly pulling her hand back and making her move before blotting her eyes. "I suggest figuring out what that is before you get sucked in so far that you can't see straight anymore and suddenly every dream you have isn't even a dream anymore."

"Sam and Dean aren't the same, you know," Lily responded after thinking over the words a moment.

Lana smiled and shook her head. "No, they're not—if you ask Sam to quit and have a life with you, he will."

**Note: ANGST. Next chapter has cuteness, another fight (big surprise there) and a hunt. I hope you guys are enjoying this! Feedback is always appreciated!**


	3. Keeping Secrets

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**So starts the chapter every day and I really do love working in the Supernatural world again, so here we go. There is some Lana being Lana and Dean being the father type in here and some cuteness…but still angst.**

**WARNINGS: **Language, Blood, Sex, Violence, Dark Themes

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

Lily had been tossing and turning all night long, finally abandoning sleep and heading out into the kitchen part of the hotel room. Lana had gotten them the digs by flirting with the maître de, Dean disgruntled about the whole thing, especially since Lana had also made a bet with him and won, being awarded the bed while Dean slept on the couch. At least it was a really large, really nice room and she sighed as she started making the coffee, the sound of the percolation waking Dean up.

He groaned and then stretched, wanting to moan about how uncomfortable he was, but the couch wasn't that bad. What bothered him the most was that he had always thought in the back of his mind that Lana would always welcome him back, but he was delusional to think that, and he knew it. Dean had pushed her so hard and she just wanted to give up and do what normal women did and Dean had to admit that the thought of being just a dad was kind of a nice thought…but only if it was with Lana.

"Why did you tell me that Lana got back with Lance?" Dean asked as he leaned on the island counter and looked at Lily. "Had I known that—"

"—you wouldn't have let her come along and we need her," Lily finished for him, and then she shrugged. "I told Sam that Lana had been trying to move forward from you, I didn't say that she and Lance were exclusively dating."

Dean made a face. "What?"

"They just slept together a couple of times," Lily responded as she glanced at the coffee pot. "Like Marin, only with history."

"I should say so! He was her high school sweetheart!" Dean snapped angrily, sitting down on one of the stools and cursing under his breath. "I'm surprised he didn't just pop the question again and give her everything she wanted!"

"He tried," Lily admitted, turning to face Dean and being a little caught off guard by how angry he was. "Dean, are you actually upset by that?"

Dean waved it off after a pause. "Why would I be? I have no right to be. I don't own her. She's a grown woman. She can sleep with whomever she wants. She can marry whomever she wants. She can fall out of love with me as easily and as quickly _as she wants_."

Lily heard his teeth grinding a bit as he punctuated the last three words and just nodded at him, reaching over and resting her hand on his. She wanted him to know that she was there, and it also made her happy to know that Lana and Dean still loved each other…it was just that they didn't want to tell each other that or talk to each other about it. While that was fine for now, Lily was starting to think that six months apart just made it _harder_ for them to face their problems…not _easier_.

"You and Lana need to talk to each other without yelling," Lily offered as she poured herself some coffee.

Dean nodded in agreement and then frowned. "Wait a minute…why aren't you peacefully sleeping in the arms of the jolly green giant?"

"Because Lana said some things that made me think," Lily admitted as she took a sip and made a face. "Too strong…"

"My girl is _very_ anti-hunting these days," Dean nodded slowly. "Just remember to make your own decisions in the end, Munchkin."

Lily smiled at him as she added a little milk and sugar to her coffee. "Lana's not anti-hunting…she's anti-hunting without a future plan and you have to admit that you blew it where that was concerned. While I don't think she was entirely right about Sam quitting if I asked, at least with Sam I _know_ that when we're both tired of this we'll 'retire' so to speak, pick a state and settle in. You basically shut down after she lost the baby and in a way…she lost you too."

Dean opened his mouth to respond, but shut it because she was right about that. When Lana lost the baby he assumed it was a sign that he wasn't allowed to have it. He buried himself in hunting when he wasn't comforting her and yet he hadn't let them have a conversation about the future either after that. It was too painful for him to think about potentially losing another baby to hunting but he'd _never_ let Lana know that it was in the cards for the future.

Lana was right in assuming that he had also thought he had dodged a bullet because he wasn't ready to be a father, but that didn't make the loss any less painful. Dean shut off the way that he shut off with everything and even understanding that, Lana was in a lot of pain too and she had to leave in order to rebuild…but it wasn't closure. They both had royally screwed up the entire fallout period of the miscarriage and it just got worse and worse until she finally just left.

"Any leads?" Dean asked instead.

Lily smiled, used to Dean's way of changing subjects. "Just Bobby…"

"Bobby's a lead?" Dean asked raising his eyebrows. "Please don't tell me that he and Florence have been…"

"Intimate?" Lily teased, laughing when Dean nodded. "You really need to learn more about Lana's family than you do. Like have you even checked in on your own? There _is_ a Winchester that doesn't hunt."

Dean swallowed down the pain at the mention of his youngest brother. "Adam's safe, that's all that matters."

"Yeah, and who do you have to thank for that?" Lily asked him gently.

xx

"If you hadn't startled me, I'd be fine!" Lana yelled at Dean, sitting down on the hood of the Impala and jerking her arm away from him, cringing as she did so.

Dean sighed and grabbed the medical kit she'd stashed in the trunk out. "I didn't mean to get you hurt and you know that, Lanni. I don't intentionally set out to harm you."

"I…I know," Lana managed, caught off guard by his use of his nickname for her.

"Good," Dean responded as he pulled out the gauze and started wiping off the blood. "This would go better if you took your shirt off."

"Not outside, I'm not!" Lana replied, red tinting her cheeks.

It wasn't even like Dean hadn't seen, but she was caught off guard by him and they went back to the hotel, Sam and Lily still off doing their part. Lana took her shirt off and sat on the edge of the bed she'd claimed, Dean getting a warm, wet wash cloth and sponging her off. She glanced at him as he tried hard not to focus on the black, lacy bra she was wearing, but he licked his lips and she caught it, flushing.

"I heard about Marin," Lana said to try and distract him because he wanted her still and she wanted him, but she was also still upset about everything he'd taken from her.

Dean paused and shook his head. "No…"

"No, what? No, we can't talk like human beings?" Lana asked him, annoyed he still wouldn't let her in. "It's fine, you know? You can get over me as easily and quickly as you want to."

"No, no—you said this was a business relationship," Dean said as he blew on her arm, Lana shivering from the cool air and from Dean blowing on her wound.

"Fine," Lana said, trying to take the bandage from him, sighing when he held it just out of her reach. "Dean, I can bandage myself up, I'm a big girl."

Dean shook his head as Lily and Sam came in. "This is my fault, remember? Let me own up to my mistakes."

"Why? I can pick up the pieces without you…" Lana shot at him.

They both made eye contact and she bit her bottom lip, realizing it had started to tremble, both of them hurt, but Sam cleared his throat. Lily smacked him for having done such a thing and interrupting the moment, and Lana and Dean just looked at the two and tried to ground themselves. Honestly, Lily had been right and they needed to talk to each other, but talking about their feelings was far too painful—especially for Dean.

"Robin here wasn't paying attention because he was trying to be all macho himself," Lana said with a shrug, making a face at the pain shooting through her arm.

Dean rolled his eyes. "You are so not Batman. She could use some painkillers though."

"Did you actually run into a demon?" Lily asked as she went to get some medicine out of Sam's duffle, Sam inspecting the wound.

"Yeah, but we didn't see it; it attacked and ran," Dean explained to them.

Lana took a deep breath. "Actually, it was a demon we've met before like Anar—"

"—Anarazel." Sam finished for her as he looked over the scratches.

Dean's eyes widened as he looked from the wound to Lana who was nodding at Sam, feeling panic rise up inside of him as Lily raised her eyebrows. The two times she'd been allowed to touch John's journal she'd read it cover to cover and yet the name of this demon wasn't ringing any immediate bells even though it seemed familiar to her, so they must have come across it before she joined them. All she knew was that suddenly everyone was panicking and she wanted to know what was going on.

"YOU'RE POISONED! THAT'S WHY IT HURTS SO MUCH!" Dean suddenly yelled at Lana, Lily letting the words sink in and frowning. "Isn't that bastard supposed to be guarding the different doors to Hell?"

Lily stepped in now. "Wait a minute, _that's_ why the name sounds familiar! He's that demon that we met the first time that…I met your mother…"

The wheels started to turn in her head as she realized that that meant that Florence was all a part of this even though they hadn't found her yet. What they needed was Bobby and Lily wondered why Lana let Dean tend to her instead of just telling him right off the bat and while she had a really good feeling as to the _why_, Dean was now getting his coat on and making sure everything was packed up. He was panicking even though Lily remembered Sam saying something about Lana's demon blood keeping demonic poisons at bay longer than anyone else could withstand them.

"We're going to Bobby right now," Dean said angrily, shaking his head. "If your mother doesn't get back to you in the next 24 hours, then _I'm_ calling her. She can't just abandon her own flesh and blood like this…"

Lily knew that this was personal to Dean because of what John had did to him and Sam, but he also loved Lana and she had been abandoned too. On top of that, it dawned on Lily and Sam as Lana bandaged up her arm and pulled her shirt on, that Dean was afraid of becoming his father and that was why it was hard to wraps his head around fatherhood. Still, Lana ended up voicing everything that they were all thinking in that moment and it broke Lily's heart to hear the tone of the words that came out of Lana's mouth.

"He was born to be a dad," Lana said gently as she grabbed her jacket, leaving Sam to grasp Lily's hand as they watched her go after Dean a moment, before grabbing their things and heading out with Dean and Lana to go and see Bobby.

**Note: Until Monique gets her part of "Never Fall Away" done, you guys might have to settle with Adam and Kat in here, but it's Lily and Sam instead of Kate and Sam, which is fine. I'm also going to see about continuing "Hunting Demons" because I'm back on the Supernatural horse, so to speak. I'll try to work on the Brean stories as well…I'm going where the inspiration takes me. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	4. Above Our Pay Grade

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**This chapter has Bobby in it, some trying to find Florence, and learning more about this Anarazel guy that's involved through learning about the past. It also has a really important sad moment that you should all pay attention to, and a really cute Lily/Sam scene!**

**WARNINGS: **Language, Blood, Sex, Violence, Dark Themes

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

"I haven't seen Florence _or_ Fecor in about a month now," Bobby admitted as he applied some of the salve to Lana's arm and took a deep breath, using Anarazel's other name. "Though if he attacked you, he was doing it for a reason…"

Lana sighed loudly and nodded. "Yeah, I know it was for a reason and I know what that reason is, but if I admit it, then Dean's going to get all high and mighty on my ass."

"Well, when the woman you love is stubborn as all Hell, sometimes you have to get a little high and mighty on her ass," Bobby told her, giving her a pointed look.

"Please, Dean just doesn't want this to be his fault,"

"You don't believe that," Bobby responded shaking his head. "You know he loves you more than anything and you know why you care—because you love him more than anything too."

Lana squirmed in her seat. "I don't know what you're talking about…"

Bobby just nodded, bandaging her up because they were on their own and if she wouldn't even admit it to him, then she was burying everything too deep right now. She had looked like she almost wanted to spill her guts, but she was trying to stay strong and Bobby understood that—Lana was so much like her mother. Stroking her hair and kissing her forehead like a father does to a daughter, Bobby went to leave the room and after a couple of moments, Sam came in and took a deep breath.

"You need to tell us more about what's going on and if Dean was allowed to come in, he'd start yelling, so…you've got me." Sam told her with a smile. "We used to be best friends, Lan…talk to me…"

Lana took a deep breath and pat the end of the bed next to her, Sam taking a seat while she ran her hands up and down her legs. She obviously wanted to tell him something and she was struggling with it, not because she didn't want to tell him, but because she wanted to tell Dean first…she owed him that much. At the same time, Dean wasn't in the room and maybe she could be vague and explain it later. Why she wanted to wait and tell Dean, she didn't know—she wasn't supposed to care.

"My mother is more connected to the doors to Hell than you might think," Lana began slowly, looking at Sam to look him in the eye. "You see, she's been in and out of a lot of doors and Fecor or Anarazel or whatever he wants to be called, is trying to get in good with a demon that wants her dead—I don't know his name. All I know is that the last six months have been fight after fight about something I don't even really know about. Our pasts are sordid and you know that…she only gave us the few stories about your parents."

Sam nodded slowly, trying to take it all in. "You're more powerful than you thought too…aren't you, Lan?"

"Yeah," she admitted sadly, shaking her head. "I never asked for any of this. Azazel saw the opportunity to strike and he did, catching my mother off guard and forcing her to have me."

"She wasn't forced though," Bobby said as he re-entered the room, Lana looking up at him. "She always told you that she wanted you, but she never explained that you were just as much her idea as you were Azazel's. Mary and I had a falling out with her over you…did she ever tell you that?" Bobby nodded as Lana shook her head, Dean and Lily entering the room too. "I think we should all sit down and really sort this out, yeah?"

_Florence rested her hand on her stomach as Bobby shook his head. "How could you though, Flor? You have __**no**__ idea what is in store for you."_

"_It's just a baby, Bobby," Florence told him rolling her eyes. "This is __**my**__ baby."_

"_It's a __**demon's **__baby," Mary responded as she rested her hand on her own more pregnant stomach. "You have no idea what's going to come out! You let him possess you and create whatever…whatever that is."_

_Florence made a face at them both. "You two are supposed to have my back. This is for the greater good, Michael told me himself."_

"_Yes, the archangel, but I'm sure this __**isn't**__ what he had in mind," Mary responded shaking her head. "I told you I was done with hunting and if this child brings so much as one demon into my life…then she can't be in Sam and Dean's."_

_Mary wasn't trying to cut out her best friend, but she'd worked too hard to keep demons away and to keep John in the dark after that terrible day and this was wrong. This was the demon that had started it all and it made her want to scream and tear her hair out, but Florence had always wanted a child and Bobby had been too stubborn to give her what she wanted. He hadn't gotten over his dead wife and probably never would, but right now Florence was getting a chance to be a mother._

_Besides, the demon seemed to keep his promises when he made them and two months into this pregnancy he had vacated because she __**wanted**__ the baby. Florence Meckenzie wasn't a normal woman by any means and he knew she wouldn't abort the baby and even if she tried, he would then just possess her again. There was a mutual agreement there and he'd been giving her the comfort and the touch of a man that Florence had been missing all these years by possessing some other man Mary had seen about that John thought Florence was involved with to keep up appearances…Bobby hated that._

"_A baby is an innocent and just because she's demonic, doesn't mean she'll be a bad person, Mary," Florence tried, smiling as she looked at her stomach again. "I promise you that I will never let anything happen to your family. I will protect them from near or from far, but this is my chance to make the difference that I was supposed to make."_

_Mary sighed and nodded, reaching out to grasp her hand. "Just remember what I said, Flor."_

"_This is the worst decision you ever made," Bobby said speaking up and shaking his head. "This goes sour and you're entirely on your own."_

"Mary forgave her, but I didn't…not at first," Bobby admitted, reaching out to stroke Lana's hair as tears filled her eyes. "When I held you in that bundle of pink blankets though, I ate my words. You were the innocent that she was waiting for to tip the balance just like Michael asked her to do. She's sacrificed so much for the angels, Lana…so much more than you know."

Dean ran his hand down his face. "Wow, I just…wow…"

"Please don't look at me differently, Dean," Lana said suddenly, not meaning to blurt that out, but needing Dean to reassure her a moment.

"Baby," Dean told her, getting down on his knees and taking her hands in his. "Hey, I'm just surprised is all. All these years our mothers have been aware of hunting and angels and sacrificing so much and as much as I still resent your mother for getting my father into this, our mothers were best friends. Imagine how hurt she was when my mom…"

He trailed off because it was painful to say what had happened, Lily resting her hand on Dean's shoulder while she ran her fingers through Sam's hair. Sam leaned into the touch and nuzzled her arm, pulling Lily onto his lap as he digested it all as well, Bobby watching over his little ones and realizing just how much he'd missed never becoming a father. He had never thought he'd make a good father and thought it would sully Susan's memory, but no…he could be their pseudo dad and keep them safe and teach them what he knew.

"She just wanted someone to help her and she wanted to have more protection for you and then she fell in love with Annie's dad and you got a sister and eventually my dad found out and he was afraid and that's why…that's why he was worried about you and Sam," Dean said aloud like it was all finally coming together completely, fingers tangling in Lana's hair as he cupped the base of her neck like he was going to kiss her, thumb running along her jaw. "We're both still mad, but it changes nothing, alright? You're still Lana, the brilliant, beautiful, stubborn pain in the ass piece of work that whipped _my_ ass into gear, alright? Right now, we need to figure out what Fecor's involvement is in all of this and that means calling Cas if this is an angel thing too…"

Lana nodded and while she and Dean both leaned in a little bit as he stroked her jaw with his thumb, and they even wet their lips in anticipation and looked at each other's, Dean pulled back so Lana did too. Neither of them wanted to cave and certainly not in front of Bobby, Sam and Lily, so instead Dean stood up and took his leave of the room to get his head on straight, Lana standing up and straightening out her tank top. She wanted to get down to the bottom of this and the sooner the better with all of this past coming out of the woodworks.

Besides, with Dean out of the room, she was more than likely about to be teased and she didn't _want_ to be teased…especially not about this. She and Dean would talk when they talked and his gesture had definitely stirred feelings for him she was trying to keep suppressed, but right now it was about getting down to business, not dealing with her personal life. Lana opened her mouth as Lily did, interrupting her even though she felt bad cutting the young woman off way more than she felt bad cutting the boys off.

"I'm going to give my mother another try while Dean is trying to get Cas to come around," Lana explained as she reached up to touch her arm. "Bobby took care of the poison, so right now I need to take care of my part in all of this. How did you guys say you came across this again?"

Sam nodded at the obvious subject change. "We ran across a demon while we were doing what we thought was a normal grab and bag a witch deal."

"Okay, so witches are involved…did the witch say anything out of the ordinary?" Lana asked, trying to stay on topic even though she could still feel Dean's touch on her skin even without him being there.

"She was just being cryptic like they all were, but then the demon showed up and mentioned Florence by name," Lily explained with a wave of her hand. "So, we told Dean we needed you because you're better at finding your mother than we are."

Lana smiled at that and shrugged. "Maybe, but I think it's only because when I start looking for her, she decides to show. You haven't seen her for a whole month, Bobby?"

"Nope," Bobby admitted shaking his head. "Last that Flor was here, not much talking got done and then she just took off."

"You really need to start keeping better tabs on my mother if you're going to bang her," Lana sighed before she and Lily started laughing.

Sam even chuckled after telling Lana to knock it off, Bobby rolling his eyes at them and then telling Lana he'd try calling her mother as well before he left the room. Lana smiled and while she didn't entirely want to leave Lily and Sam alone, Sam was nuzzling Lily as she sat there on his lap, a comforting presence, and she took her leave. She was still in overdrive mother-mode, but Lana knew that Sam and Lily cared deeply for each other and she wanted to give them some space…not that she was going to stop mothering.

That was just what Lana did.

She was worried that Lily was going to sucked into this world deeper than she needed to be sucked in, and she was also worried that she might get hurt. When her mother was involved, really intense and terrible things happened and Lana knew that she was going to have to deal with it, but Lily _didn't_ have to. Lily could be kept safe even though Lana was sure that Lily partially wanted to know more about Azazel just because he took everything from her, just like he'd taken everything from everyone else.

Sam stroked Lily's hair and kissed her, aware they were alone, Lily cupping his face as she kissed him back, lips crushing together gently. When Sam dipped his head to deepen the kiss between them, Lily opened up her mouth and moaned involuntarily, letting Sam taste her slow and sweet, smiling and making eye contact with him when he pulled away, stroking her cheek. There was so much love and tender care in his eyes and she nuzzled his nose with her own.

"There's hope for them yet," Lily said as she settled into Sam.

Sam nodded and chuckled. "They're stubborn, but they'll make it. That admission from Dean about who she was in front of all of us was a pretty big step."

"Almost as big or bigger than standing on the pool table that one time in the bar when she was so mad at him that she started hitting on the bartender and he announced that she was his and he was hers and anyone that came near her would literally get beaten with a stick?" Lily asked as she laughed, recalling the spectacle. "God, we got kicked out of the motel room a _lot_ over the week that followed that."

"I remember," Sam said nodding and then kissed Lily gently again. "At some point, you and I need to kick everyone out of a motel room…"

Lily blushed but she smiled a nodded. "It has been a little while, hasn't it? It's a date."

"Oh, of course there is a date first," Sam teased, nipping at her bottom lip with his teeth. "At the moment though, we should go see if we can't get a lead on where Anarazel might be…"

**Note: There you have it! THINGS ARE GETTING INTENSE, lol. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	5. Recruiting the Sidelines

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**I think this chapter is one of my favorite ones so far, to be honest, and I hope that you guys like it too! There's a lot in it, so pay attention.**

**WARNINGS**: Language, Blood, Sex, Violence, Dark Themes

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

"You're really wound up," Sam said as he made it outside.

Bobby was with Lily and Lana trying to get in contact with Florence and Sam wanted to make sure that his brother was alright. He knew what that look on his face was and they were all learning so much about their parents and it hurt. Lily had gotten to have some semblance of a life before they were taken from her, but at the same time, they had all been jipped as far as life was concerned and now all they had was each other…this was strange. Florence had definitely planned all of this and while she said it was for the angels, part of that was hard to believe.

She had faith that she had passed on to her daughter, but there were other ways to please the angels weren't there? On top of that, Dean was having a hard time with this because Sam knew exactly where Dean wanted to be and he couldn't be there because Lana had her walls up like they had been when she and Dean had started all of this and Dean wasn't sure how to tear the walls down. Honestly, Sam didn't know how to help him to do that.

"What if Lana and I turn out like Bobby and Florence?" Dean asked Sam suddenly, shaking his head. "I can't let her slip through my fingertips just because I'm terrified of being a dad."

Sam paused and then shook his head. "Lana isn't going to run off and make a baby with a demon, Dean."

"That's not what I meant, Smartass," Dean responded rolling his eyes. "I know that she tried to move on from me and I know she's pissed as Hell with me, but I just…all of that information and it didn't change my mind. I can still picture her toting around a kid on her hip that has my incredible good looks."

"Even trying to be romantic you're conceited," Sam teased, laughing and nodding. "I think that's good though, Dean…that you can love her no matter happens. Right now, I think that Lana could use you even if she's angry with you but I think we both know that she's just angry because you never went after her. She's angry because she never wanted to do this job, got sucked in, enjoyed it, and then didn't have a way out so that she could be a mother because you started acting like a total tool—hey, let me finished," Sam chuckled when Dean tried to cut in. "Florence is going to show up and she's going to tell us why the demons are all riled up and then what happens? Does Lana just go back to her life without you?"

Dean sighed loudly. "I never should have given her a life without me."

"Sounds overbearing, but I know what you mean."

Even though Dean gave Sam another look, the two of them smiled at each other as Lily handed Lana a cup of coffee. Other than Dean, nothing quite made Lana's eyes light up like caffeine in a cup, and so she smiled and then took a sip, loving the strong flavor and texting her mother yet again because when she was relentless it normally paid off. Besides, if the demons were restless enough that Anarazel came to _poison_ her to 'slow her down', then her mother wasn't going to stay in the shadows for long—she always protected when she could.

"Are you and Dean ever going to talk about anything?" Lily asked calmly.

Lana smiled and shrugged. "It's inevitable at this rate. Whenever we end up in the same vicinity for a long period of time, one of us wears down, then we argue, then we have great sex and in the post coital bliss we actually talk things out. It's not the healthiest way to deal with problems, but this _is_ Dean Winchester we're talking about."

"Oh, I know," Lily responded laughing. "He's still the guy on top of the pool table, you know?"

"I know…I also know that you told him about Lance and he's feeling territorial now," Lana said giving Lily a look. "Lance was a two time thing and I'm not going back there, but I'm still upset. Dean pushes my buttons like no one else does and right before diving head first into a hunt? I just feel like we should be focused but we're not. I don't want you or Sam or even Dean getting hurt and I just…he made me feel so bad, you know? He never wanted to talk about it after the one time we did and I needed more than that."

"All I'm saying," Lily began slowly, "is that if you and Dean talked to _each other_ instead of to _me and Sam_…maybe something would get resolved. This isn't _just_ about the baby, you just hide behind that because that hurts the _most_ out of all of it. You're also upset that he killed that demon."

Lana pursed her lips together. "If he was alive now, this would all be easier and you know it."

xx

"Wait a minute, wait a minute…something bigger than letting Lucifer rise is coming?" Kat asked Florence as she rubbed her temples. "Look, Aunt Flor…Adam and I don't hunt. We know all about it and we lend the occasional researching hand, but we don't hunt…at all."

Florence smiled and nodded, stroking her hair in a motherly fashion. "I know, sweetheart, but you also need to be aware of what is going on. I already told Kat and she's on her way and soon I'll let Lana know. Right now, I'm making sure all of the loose ends are tied up because if a demon comes to you or Adam, I want you to be ready."

"I get that, and I _know_ that Kate is going to get all mothering on me, but…how bad is it?" Kat managed to ask, dreading the answer.

"Let's just say that bringing Lucifer about was all part of the Apocalypse plan," Florence admitted with a gentle shrug. "Lana played her part in killing Lilith even though she didn't know she was playing the part and neither did I, and while Lucifer has been keeping his distance, something bigger is at play and Fecor is on the move. I have to go to my daughter…but you need to stay safe, Kat."

Kat nodded and let her aunt kiss her forehead again, watching as she left the house and Adam came in. It was time that she explained some things to him and she knew he'd want to talk to Sam and Dean, but that was normal because they were his older brothers. He owed Lana his life and he was glad he had family, but he was also glad that he got to be normal: go to school, enjoy his girlfriend; look forward to a normal life. He wasn't about to take this for granted…but like Kat, he probably wouldn't want to stay still either.

xx

Lana knew it was a trap the moment that Bobby said he needed Lily and Sam for a little 'side project'. Whatever the 'project' was, Lana was fairly certain that it had something to with her and Dean talking out their issues and while she knew they had to, she just didn't want to. She had been perfectly fine with the way that Dean had made things between them, because even though it hurt, it was something to focus on. It wasn't healthy and she knew that, but she also knew that everything bottled up inside of them was just going to explode into an argument, not a talk.

"Wanna play chess?" Lana asked Dean with a smirk on her face.

Dean gave her a look. "Seriously?"

"I figured it was an ice breaker and the look on your face was worth it," Lana replied as she sat on the couch and crossed her legs underneath her. "So…they left us here to talk, you know. Should we do that, or spite them and not do a single thing they want?"

"I think we should definitely…_not_ play chess," Dean told her with a laugh. "If we start opening up, one or both of us is going to start yelling…"

Lana nodded in agreement and yet she kind of felt like maybe yelling some more was worth it and maybe she could do this. The two of them, after all, needed to let everything out and she had missed him so desperately that sometimes she couldn't take it because there had been times that arguing then resulted in making up and then she'd at least get Dean's arms around her again…she missed that. She missed everything about him. His smell, his touch, his sighs of comfort _and_ pleasure…all of it.

"You abandoned me," Lana said plainly, looking at him. "You and I have always gotten through everything, but what you said to me was the last straw and deep down you had to know that."

Dean sighed and sat down on the couch with her. "You caught me off guard."

"That's my job!" Lana protested, tossing her hands up in the air. "You told me once that I kept you on your toes—that my honestly and my needs for more kept you grounded in normalcy."

"I have to kill every demon responsible for all of our hardships," Dean found himself saying, shrugging as he shook his head. "I'm not done yet."

"Done doing what?" Lana asked exasperatedly.

"There are still demons out there responsible for getting our kid killed!" Dean thundered suddenly.

That admission and how loud Dean got voicing it made Lana jump a moment, startled, but the words settled in. She knew that he had taken her miscarriage pretty hard, but he had never really let on how hard, just said it upset him and been there for her while she was recovering…but he'd just gotten so involved in hunting. It made sense to Lana that Dean would be doing this for revenge, but why hadn't he told her? She wouldn't have just packed up and left if he had just been more honest with her.

"You were pushing me away on purpose to keep me away from demons," Lana told him, shaking her head. "_Knowing_ that my place was beside you, you said all of those hurtful things to me to _make_ me leave."

"_You don't mean that," Lana said slowly, clearly incredibly hurt by his words._

_Dean hadn't meant it to come out like that, but something inside of him told him that this was for the better—it was breaking his heart, but he needed her safe. She'd done the same to him before on a much less hurtful level, but she would do it again in a heartbeat to save him and they both knew it. Regardless of how much they begged each other to let them in and trust them, they would do anything to protect the people that they loved…at __**any**__ cost._

"_I do," he said nodding. "I told you all that stuff about settling down and having an apple pie life because hey, you were pregnant. I was never, __**not**__ going to own up and be a dad but now…now you can get out if you don't want this, but I do. Hunting makes me feel—"_

"—_like you mean something," Lana finished for him as tears started to leak out of her eyes. "So that's it, huh? Everything we've been through was for nothing? You just placated me because you knocked me up?"_

_Dean took a deep breath. "I told you before we got in this deep that I didn't want you to get attached, Lana. I let everyone down and a hunter? That's just who I am. Now you can make a clean break and get away from me."_

"_Dean, I know you better than this…"_

"_Obviously you don't…"_

"I _knew_ you couldn't mean half of the hurtful things you said, but you said them and you wouldn't take them back," Lana told him shaking her head. "God, the only reason I jumped right into bed with Lance practically was because I thought you honestly decided you didn't care. I thought something snapped for you. I mean everything we've been through—Lilith, Sam dying, me dying, you dying and going to Hell…we _wanted_ a baby, remember?"

Dean knew his voice was trembling. "Yeah…yeah, we did…"

"What do you want right now, though?" Lana asked him slowly, wiping a tear away but keeping eye contact with him.

"I want to know how long we've all been pawns in this game of life or death between Heaven and Hell," Dean said without skipping a beat. "Right now, I want to find your mother, find the demons, and figure out what it is that Lucifer really wants."

Lana nodded and then stood up, ready to leave the room and Dean knew it. "That's what I thought—good news is my mother texted me back…we've got a meeting place all set up."

**Note: They're stubborn, okay? That's just how they are programmed. You guys will get another chapter soon, I just got caught up in work and in Iron Man 3 tonight so, yeah. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	6. Not a Monster

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**And here is the next chapter, guys! It's got a lot in it, including Florence being there and cliffhanger I think you guys will actually like. ^.^**

**WARNINGS**: **Language, Blood, Sex, Violence, Dark Themes**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

Dean felt like he had screwed up yet again the moment that Lana left out that door and his heart sank as he nodded to himself. This was partially his fault and there was nothing that he could do about that, except maybe take responsibility for his actions and man up. So, he headed out with her and leaned on the counter as she made herself some coffee, Lana avoiding looking at him right now.

"I want more than that," Dean found himself admitting.

Lana shrugged gently like she didn't care, but they both knew that she cared quite a lot. "Okay,"

"You know, this is all your fault," Dean told her with a sigh, shrugging when she shot him a glare. "Don't look at me like that, Lanni, you _know_ it is. You had to wear that hot little black number at that wake and then seduce me with your hunting skills and ability to banter with me. _You_ out of absolutely nowhere, decided that you loved me and wanted to be with me and I lost myself in you and _loved _it…every minute of it."

"But you won't stay, will you?" Lana asked him, tearing up.

She knew what he was trying to do because she knew him well enough, but the fact of the matter was that Lana didn't want to do this anymore. Lana didn't want to have to hunt anymore and Dean wasn't done with his revenge so this was like a bandaid. This was Dean coming back into her life to break her heart again and she didn't want that…that and she sure as Hell didn't want Sam and Dean to hurt Lily.

Lana loved Lily like a little sister and actually really wanted to see Lily and Annie interact again because it was nice to see her practically sister hang out with her actual sister. On top of that, the love she had for her made her want to protect her on a constant basis and since she was a little angry with the boys, it made that feeling go into overdrive. More than anything, she wanted to make sure that Lily was happy.

"All we've ever done is run away," Dean told her, shaking his head. "Things get hard and one of us runs."

Taking a deep breath, Lana nodded. "You've been running since we met. I just thought that I could catch you and I was obviously wrong. My Mom is waiting, Dean."

"Lanni," Dean said gently.

"No, I can't do this right now," Lana told him as she headed out of the kitchen.

Dean sighed loudly and got himself a cup of coffee, knowing that no matter what he did he wasn't going to get through to her. She was a stubborn piece of work—one of the many things he loved about her—and he would just have to talk to her later. Right now they had to meet with Florence, so Dean headed out into the living room and then smiled a little because there she was in all her glory. Florence knew how to get from one place to another rather easily…something Lana figured out how to do when she gave into her powers.

That was another thing about Lana: she was beginning to become what she had always been meant to be and it was terrifying. Part of Dean being afraid of being a 'dad' was because of the blood his kid would have, not anything other than that. He had grown up a hunter and Lana was something that he was supposed to hunt—offspring of a witch and a demon. Now he knew that Florence was more than okay with having said daughter, and it opened a door for more questions than answers.

Lana was supposed to be a pawn and she had done what she had needed to do. Florence had raised her to be good, however, and Lana was the best person that Dean had ever known. She'd gone on hunts with them, fought the bad guys and loved him more than anyone had ever loved him and he loved her. Things were shades of grey with them and he was more than okay with that. Now her mother was here and something other than Lucifer rising was happening and Lana still felt really, really bad about the Lucifer thing.

She thought she was saving the boys.

Honestly, she couldn't have known that she was breaking the last seal, and there was more to her than even the boys knew. This vessel thing was happening and they weren't sure how to handle it because maybe they didn't want to know. Sam wanted to be with Lily and Dean wanted to be with Lana, even though he was hiding behind hunting. Still, Dean didn't want to talk about most of this and Lily wanted to quit eventually and Lana wanted her to get to have a normal life.

Lana wanted a normal life.

"Good to see you again, Dean." Florence said smiling at him. "Honestly I didn't realize you guys were still together."

Lana shook her head. "We're not."

"Really? Because last I knew you got your ability to conceive back and you tried for a baby," Florence explained before she nodded. "Which, of course ended badly, right. Okay, so you want to know about Anarazel, right? You want to know about why you're dragged back in to something bigger? Seems to me that this is going to be a long conversation…"

Florence hadn't meant to bring the baby up like that, and Lily found herself standing in the doorway wishing she knew what to say. She and Sam had touched on it more than once, but Lana didn't like to talk about not being able to have kids because they were dark years after her accident. Then she'd died and come back and thought she was shiny and new, but the angels had made it so she couldn't have a baby…until she did everything Castiel told her do. Then he'd healed her and she and Dean were so excited and then that hunt…that hunt that made Dean pull a 180 and no one knew why.

"I helped Lucifer to rise and he said he'd leave me alone," Lana explained, taking a deep breath. "I'm able to be his vessel."

Sam and Lily both looked at her. "I'm sorry…what?"

"Lucifer said that both Sam and I could be his vessel," Lana admitted, shrugging. "So is Fecor here because of me? Or because of you?"

"Because of me," Florence said slowly. "Because I had a daughter with Azazel and they want her."

"_They_ want her?" Dean asked, moving toward Florence. "What do you mean _they_?"

Lily took a deep breath. "Are you saying this is all a set up?"

Lana and the boys looked at her and she shrugged, trying to put it all together because it was obvious to her. She was trying to make a connection and it seemed like a demon kind of thing to have a plan and Lana was this specimen that both sides wanted to have her and she had chosen her side…the demons _hated_ that. They wanted for her to be a demon like Azazel had wanted her to be—someone to lead the armies out of Hell—but she became a good guy and not it was time to make her suffer.

"It just seems to me that they brought us all together to maybe bring Florence out of hiding…so…what are you?" Lily asked Florence. "What makes you so important?"

Lana looked at her. "My mother is a witch that had the daughter of a demon."

"I'm from Purgatory…" Florence admitted after a moment.

"What?" Lana asked her, starting to hyperventilate. "Did you just say that you were from Purgatory?!"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on…what the fuck?" Dean asked her. "What exactly is happening?"

Florence took a deep breath and sat on the couch, trying to figure out what to say because she didn't know how to explain this. She'd been around for a long, long, time, making a deal with angels and becoming good friends with Mary and then the boys were born and then Lana and then Florence tried to settle down and had Annie and then Azazel killed Annie's father and it made her want to even more be on the side of good. She didn't know what to do, but she knew that she had to explain if it was the last thing that she did.

"I came out of Purgatory, which let me tell you, is a terrible, _terrible_ place," Florence began, shaking her head. "I was young and naïve and began to hang around with a bunch of demons until I found faith. I found faith and made a deal with angels to grow old and serve the lord and I've been doing that ever since. Then Azazel found me and I wanted to protect Mary like I couldn't the first time, but he possessed me…he wanted a baby. He wanted a weapon and I wanted a child and so when he left me, I took off and I tried to mask you with my natural abilities and then somehow along the road you found Dean and Sam and the demons found you."

Lana shook her head. "I was fighting demons before I met Sam and Dean."

"Sam and Dean helped you make a name for yourself amongst the demons," Florence told her with a shrug. "Azazel was after them and then his own daughter fell for the eldest and he wasn't a happy camper."

"So this is our fault?" Sam asked slowly.

"No, no—this is not your fault," Lana said quickly, reaching out to take Sam's hand. "I was going to be found out sooner or later."

"Granted that we screw up people's lives, it was probably our fault," Dean said shaking his head. "So you're the offspring of a demon and a creature from Purgatory?"

Florence laughed a little bit. "There are beasts in Purgatory, but I'm not a beast. I'm just a soul that escaped and tried to have a better life."

"But that kind of makes me a monster," Lana told her, sitting down and putting her head in her hands. "I'm just a monster and I had that miscarriage on purpose."

"Give me a moment with Lanni," Dean said aloud.

Everyone nodded and left the room, Lana shaking her head as she held it in her hands, wishing she could figure it out. This had all been a plan gone wrong and she'd tried for _so_ long to be the good guy, but she was being ridiculous right now and so Dean got on his knees and put his hands on hers. She tried to pull her hands away, but his hands found her face, Dean determined to get through to her no matter what.

"Dean, stop, you're off the hook," Lana told him, looking him in the eye as he brought his face in closer to hers.

Dean shook his head. "I couldn't be off the hook if I tried."

Lana was about to say something else when Dean pressed his lips to hers, practically melting at the physical contact. He'd missed her these last six months and hated himself for the terrible things that he had said, and yet when faced with this new information, he wasn't even running. Florence had reminded him that through it all he had _wanted_ to be with Lana and had _wanted_ to have a family with her and this changed absolutely nothing. Sam had been right all these years about shades of grey, and Dean was finally realizing that.

So he kissed her, passionate and true, pulling her in close and smiling a little when she nipped at his bottom lip gently. She felt that spark between him and she knew that this was what she wanted—and she knew that Dean wanted it too. There was nothing like that spark and he'd never felt it with anyone the way he felt it with Lana. In fact, he had never been as in love with her as he was right then seeing her reaction to what her blood defined her as.

"You are the best person that I know," Dean whispered against her mouth. "You are _not_ a monster and I want you, okay? I avoided you because all I brought to your life was pain, and I said those terrible things because I thought I could get you killed and I couldn't live with that."

Lana nodded, leaning her cheek against his hand. "If anything _I'm_ going to get _you_ killed."

"You know I won't let that happen," Dean teased, kissing her again. "After this hunt…let me prove to you how much you mean to me."

**Note: More Lily and Sam next chapter, I just wanted to have some of the information out in the open for now. Next chapter tomorrow! Feedback is always appreciated!**


	7. Trying to Move Past the Past

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**This focuses a little bit on Sam and Lily and also a bit on some of the past you guys don't really know about between the girls and the boys.**

**WARNINGS**: **Language, Blood, Sex, Violence, Dark Themes**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

"Lana knows how to make really good coffee," Lily told Sam, giggling when he rested his hands on her hips from behind. "I guess that makes sense since it—"

"—runs through her veins," Sam finished for her.

She smiled and leaned back into Sam as he wrapped his arms around her, both of them trying to digest all of this information. They'd known Lana for years, gone on all sorts of hunts, seen her soft side and assumed that someday she'd be a mother…and now she was actually part from Purgatory? What was her mother then? Honestly just a soul? Or was she something else? It wouldn't be the first time that Florence wasn't being _entirely_ truthful about her life or her daughter's. Plus…did that mean that Lana wasn't really human?

It was hard to believe because she acted the most human out of all of them, and she was as moral as could be. That meant that they could still trust her even though this new information had arisen—she had always been half demon and they knew that. In fact it had been hard to adjust to, but they knew that she was Lana Meckenzie and that she would die for any of them and hated everything that demons stood for. Just because her mother was from Purgatory, didn't make _Lana_ evil.

"So, how long are we staying here do you think?" Lily asked slowly, turning around and looking up at Sam.

Sam looked down at Lily and shrugged. "I suppose that's partially up to Dean…and if he wants to stay this time."

"I'm all up for that," Lily said wrapping her arms around him. "I mean, we always end up at Lana's, she gives you and I the guest room, and then we're like four happy people under one roof getting to relax in Kansas and doing whatever we want until a hunt pops up and then the four of us run off onto the road and then we gank demons and make dirty jokes—it's a riot."

"Dean's just afraid of ending up with Lana again and then ending up being a father," Sam explained with a shrug. "He wants it, but he's afraid of the demons coming after them like they always do. He's afraid of becoming dad."

"He won't ever be John," Lily said shaking her head. "He'll be great at fatherhood."

Sam smiled at her and nodded, leaning down to kiss her, which to many was a strange sight. He was so tall and she was so short, but they were in love and that was all that really mattered to them. So, they kissed for a little while right there in the kitchen, Sam slipping his fingers into Lily's hair and pulling her close to him, Lana smiling at them as she entered the kitchen. Her presence was noticed by Sam, who gave Lily a quick kiss before he turned to Lana and smiled a little bit at her. She was his best friend and he wanted to know how she was almost as much as he wanted to kiss Lily.

"How are you doing?" Sam asked Lana slowly.

Lana shrugged and went for the coffee pot. "Better than Dean. He's acting cool about it, but you remember what happened when I told him about my father being a demon…"

"He took off and almost hooked up with a waitress?" Lily asked, nodding when Lana did. "Sorry, I know that's a poor subject for you."

"No, no, it's fine. I completely understood too, even though I was so hurt," Lana explained slowly. "But regardless of him telling me he's okay with this, I know the wheels in his head are turning."

"At least he hasn't taken off this time and I don't think that he will," Sam told Lana as he put a hand on her shoulder. "Just give him the benefit of the doubt."

"I'm trying, but hunting is making that a little hard," Lana admitted gently.

She wasn't completely forgiving right now about the hunting thing, but she knew that she was dragged into this for good now. Demons had always been after Lana, scoping her out, and now she knew why and it kind of hurt her—she was a monster. She was an asset and that meant that being around her was dangerous…so should she ditch them all? Go off by herself and save them? No. She couldn't just run and she also knew that she could take care of herself _and_ protect her friends if they needed her to.

Lana had been practicing her powers ever since finding out that Azazel was her father and Florence had even taught her how to heal like Angels did, which always _did_ make her wonder. She didn't know as much about Purgatory as she wanted to, and that meant calling Bobby and figuring something out. Later, though, because she was trying to understand what it meant to have blood in her from something out of Purgatory.

"Don't start something if you don't intend to finish it," Lana said suddenly, looking back and forth between Sam and Lily. "I mean it, Sam…treat her right."

Sam just nodded as Lana went out of the room, leaving him with Lily and it dawned on him that she might be taking her issues with Dean out on him. He had never thought about hurting Lily and should she ever want to leave hunting, he would leave it with her. Sam Winchester couldn't picture his life without Lily Harte and he wasn't about to push her out of it again…the whole demon blood fiasco was hard enough on her and he was still making up for it—he knew that. He also knew that Lana wasn't about to let this go because she was stubborn and that meant he and Lily were going to have to step this up.

"She and Dean need to make up and now," Lily said shaking her head. "She's not going to stop feeling on edge with us until she and Dean are happy again."

Sam nodded slowly. "When you meet your person, you should get to have a life with them."

"Exactly," Lily said as she smiled up at Sam. "Like when I met you. There's nothing I wouldn't do for you…even though I admit that I had to leave when the demon blood feeding was happening. I just couldn't handle that."

"You shouldn't have had to," Sam told her cupping her face. "No one should have had to. I never should have gotten that far off of the reserve and then Lana went and killed Lilith and I just—you helped me detox. You were there for me, and I will never not be there for you."

"I love you too," Lily told him before kissing him gently.

Sam smiled at her, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear before she scrunched up her nose playfully at him and then moved to leave the room. She had a couple of things that she wanted to get taken care of and Sam didn't blame her—he had some things to research, which was definitely what he and Lily were best at. In fact they did their best researching together, Lily and Sam. They were a great team and Sam knew that this new information about Lana was definitely something they all needed to get into.

Lana, on the other hand, headed straight up to her room and when she opened up her door, she sighed because Dean was lounging on her bed. He was clothed, at least, Lana half expecting him to be naked, but he just seemed to want to talk to her and her bed _was_ where they had been physically intimate the first time. They had left Bobby's to come here and Dean wanted to be as close to Lana as possible…that meant her room.

"Way to be creepy," Lana said giving him a thumbs up as she moved to her dresser, "I assume you'll watch me dress too?"

Dean laughed a little. "No, you're far too angry for that—you'll take your clothes into the bathroom and change where I can't see you."

"Or I'll be the biggest tease and I'll dress right here and not let you touch anything," Lana retorted, smiling when Dean smirked. "I meant it before when I said you were in the clear, Dean. You don't owe me anything."

"I owe you everything," Dean responded gently.

"Everything?" Lana asked him skeptically as she took off her shirt and tossed it into the hamper. "I actually highly doubt it."

Dean chuckled and let his eyes wander over her chest. "You've saved Sam and I more than I can count, defied your father, gone up against the angels for me—you're amazing, Lanni. You're beautiful and strong and I know I ran when I found out you were part demon, but you just…you gotta have more faith in me now, okay?"

"I know I need to have more faith in you," Lana replied as she pulled on a tank top, "but that doesn't mean that I just do. I'm trying here, but we lost the baby and then I lost you. I lost you and I didn't think that you were coming back to me. Then this happened and it's just one more reason for you to think that I'm a freak."

"A freak I would still marry," Dean told her shrugging.

Lana gave him a look. "We haven't been engaged since we lost the baby. I took that ring off when I walked out the door. You can't just say things like that!"

"Even when they're true?" Dean asked her, sitting up. "Look, that hunt? Everything changed…_everything_. I felt like shit this entire six months, Lanni! Do you think that I like being away from you?! That losing the baby didn't hurt?!"

"Dean, guess what happened on that hunt?" Lana asked him angrily, shimmying off her pants and grabbing pajama pants. "I got a fucking rod run through me and I lost our baby!"

Dean sighed and ran his hand down his face. "And I was there! The entire time! I helped you through it! Snuggled you! Held your hand! I _mourned_ with you! Demons will always be after us! I freaked okay?! I thought that it was because of me and I had to have you _away_ from me!"

"I get that, okay?! I get that!" Lana exclaimed shaking her head. "You were just as heartbroken as me, but how could you?! How could you think that we were better off apart?! How could you say all of those hurtful things to me?! I mean we were going to get married and have a baby and then I lost the baby and then you hurt me and I had to be away. I thought I could get through it, away…"

"But then Lily, the giant and I brought you back into the fold and you found out your mother was from Purgatory?" Dean asked her.

Lana nodded, looking like she was going to cry, Dean moving from the bed to her and she let him wrap his arms around her. He held her close and stroked her hair, knowing that Lana was stubborn and also knowing that no matter what happened, she would be there for him. Sure, he would have to repent a lot, but he was willing to _grovel_ if that meant that he could have Lana back. She was the only steady part of his life, and had been for years…he had said all of those awful things because he thought he was protecting her, but he had just caused himself a lot of pain and _her_ a lot of pain.

"If I could do it all over again, I would," Dean admitted to her.

She nodded, looking at him. "I would too."

"I would have kept you close," Dean told her, shaking his head.

"I wouldn't have just walked out," Lana explained to him.

"Remember when we actually trusted each other?"

"Remember when we actually stood by each other?"

"How do we get this back?" Dean asked her.

Lana shrugged a little bit. "Time…I need it to trust you again, but before then, I think that it's okay if you sleep in my bed as long as you don't grope me."

"How do I not grope you?" Dean teased, chuckling when she pushed on him and laughed. "Sorry, I just can't resist you."

"Lucky you, I can't resist you either, but I mean it," Lana said shrugging. "This is a baby step."

**Note: Next chapter has a little bit of past in it and some Lily and Lana fun times as well as some Lily and Sam cuteness and Lana and Dean chatting. Feedback is always appreciated!**


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